As I mentioned in part I of “Journey to Marriage: How we met”, Amner began preaching about delaying gratification… To condense it for the sake of the post it was mainly about how we spend our short lives here on earth always wanting things NOW and how waiting upon God for those desires is ALWAYS worth it.
This preaching was a foreshadowing for our future relationship and what I was going to entail. Looking back at it now, we both agree it was God who was literally warning us from the beginning. He is amazing, right?
Anyways, after Amner preached, he invited me out to eat with his two cousins. He gave me a ride to the location and this is where our friendship began to unfold. We spoke music, life experiences and the tables began to turn. Amner was fascinated with the way God spoke to me and called me out and I was admiring his various spiritual testimonies and encounters.
I remember it like it was yesterday, the night took over and we where still talking. His cousins and friends where in another part of his apartment talking and laughing and we where on our backs starring at the starless city sky… Talking away about life and how its meaningless without Christ.
As you could imagine, feelings began to develop… But we ignored it as much as we could because I was fresh out of a relationship and our age gap (13 years) seemed too crazy. But then it happened… We became “a thing”, we weren’t “boyfriend” and “girlfriend” yet but we where definitely a thing… Talking all day, going out here and there and trying to be as exclusive as possible. We wanted only the people who saw us together to know and my family knew as well. (They freaked out at first, but when they met him they fell in love)
As months passed rumors began to pop-up here and there. People began talking and this led our relationship into a new territory that we didn’t have to enter. It brought out insecurities in me, insecurities of validation and commitment. It brought Amner fear. Fear of being looked at as a creep and fear of losing respect as a leader in the church. Mind you, I hadn’t met his family yet… Its been about a year and 2 months. I was shaking with insecurity because I knew my worth. I knew I was the woman you take to your parents the moment you decide to date. But that just wasn’t our story and I hated it.
Although a time to meet his parents, be validated and be considered his official girlfriend would one day arrive, the process getting there was not easy. I questioned identity multiple times. If I could go back and speak to insecure 2013-2014 Michele, I would tell her “YOU ARE VALUABLE, its not the time… You have no business running around with Amner until he finally encounters HIS identity in Christ. Once he does, everything will fall into place…”
& Sure enough it did… A season of separation arose. I felt like everything fell apart and my life was changing… & Thank God for that. It was what was needed in order to be “ready” to continue in the journey of marriage.
To be continued…
UP NEXT: Season of Separation. Amners ultimate encounter with God. How the Lord pulled us apart in order to strengthen our identities in Him and bring us back together.